US witches coordinate casting of spell to oust Trump, will perform ritual every crescent moon until desired effect is achieved 

Roger Scruton: Portraying old curriculum as irrelevant means betraying the youth, emphasis on ancient history and literature as well as classical languages gives knowledge that can be used to solve unforeseeable problems 

Nassim Nicholas Taleb: Attractive surface contraindication for quality, specialists who diverge from expected appearance more likely to have exceptional skills than those following aesthetic norms 

Camille Paglia: Glamour and romance of Oscars and Hollywood gone, replaced by cynicism and austerity, today's stars pale in comparison to luminous charisma of Elizabeth Taylor 

French waitress drags 180 cm long lizard out of restaurant in Australia, commended by natives for bravery and given nickname "goanna girl"  

Yakuza chief fingered as brain behind knife attack against nurse involved in botched plastic surgery of his genitals 

Polish woman becomes first foreign female professional shogi player, learned game through translated manga, trained by herself before traveling to Japan to compete in tournaments 

New law in Colorado can make home delivery of cannabis legal, the same household may not purchase more than one ounze per day, the user can't be intoxicated and must be 21 years old 

French restaurant awarded Michelin star by mistake, gourmets overwhelm modest bistro which is mostly frequented by lunching workmen 

Omar Abdel-Rahman dead in US prison, inspired numerous terror plots and said to be spiritual guide of 9/11 plotters 

Handwriting style for US librarians developed by committee in 1885, partly based on research done by Edison to find optimal handwriting for telegraph operators 

Residents of Vegas del Genil, Spain demand exorcist being called to cleanse ghost from town hall, mayor dismisses worry as collective psychosis and will focus on earthly matters 

Joel Mokyr: Europe's wealth came to be through political fragmentation spurring competition and innovation combined with cultural unity enabling exchange of ideas 

29% of liberals on Match.com feel less like dating after Trump victory, no similar effect for conservatives now or after Obama victory in 2012 

St Petersburg library offers opulent environment with 5,000 volumes of republished historical works, entrance fee is USD 122 for four hours, yearly membership USD 4,000 

Jessica Kiang: Film about young Karl Marx bittersweet and intelligent but misses opportunities for interesting provocation in too glorifying and unannounced portrayals 

Students wear puzzle-piece shaped pins to highlight their white privilege, want to force everyone to think about racial issues 

Playboy brings nudity back to the magazine, says it represents freedom  

Man sought by police for dressing like Adolf Hitler arrested in dictator's birth town Braunau am Inn (German)

New dating app requires phone call before being able to chat, says users are very interested, calls last 25 minutes on average 

Man sues Uber over glitch that sent ride history to his wife's phone despite him logging off, says it resulted in their divorce 

Double of Adolf Hitler seen multiple times in the latter's birth town Braunau, calls himself Harald Hitler and is sought by police on suspicion of criminal glorification of infamous dictator 

New Zealand PM Bill English wins sheep shearing contest against multiple world champion, expresses deep respect for shearer's skill, work ethic and athleticism 

Dolphins suspected of using blowfish for drug effect, observed holding fish in mouths for hours and passing them to other dolphins 

Boris Johnson renounces US citizenship after having to pay US taxes on sale of London house in 2014 

Apple design highly overrated, bad solutions hidden under polished exteriors, Steve Jobs design philosophy fascistic rather than exacting, new building for 5 billion USD yet another example of design failure 

Traces inside 5,000-year-old Chinese pottery used to brew beer in ancient way by archeology students at Stanford 

Antinatalists think Earth would be better off without humans, thousands and increasingly organized hope this generation becomes last and goes out with liberal and happy party 

Democratic Party gives confusing press conference where Nancy Pelosi says she cannot cooperate with president Bush and Maxine Waters denounces Russian invasion of Korea 

Socialist group at University of Central Florida holds workshop inspired by Fight Club to teach leftist students to fight, marketed with slogan "bash the fash" 

Black Sabbath gives last concert in Birmingham where legendary rock group was founded nearly 50 years ago 

Sequel to horror movie The Ring lacks predecessors' power as young audience does not relate to VHS tapes, technical progress poses challenge to genre which previously made use of talismanic attributes of electrical gadgets 

In Facebook Group Bad Girls Advice women bragging about how they abuse their men are celebrated, administrator claims it to be a one-time event 

74-year-old known as Cookie Man distributes cookies laced with hash oil to fellow parishioners in Bloomington, Indiana, all victims seek emergency treatment at local hospital 

Paris places urinal with built-in compost and plant growing at place infamous for smell of irregular relieving of needs outside Gare de Lyon station 

Man whose back was tattooed by artist Wim Delvoye sells himself to art collector, spends rest of life sitting on display in art galleries, thereafter his skin is framed and made part of collection 

Chinese and South Korean athletes will be able to participate in Asian Winter Games, as organizing committee allows change to accommodation which does not provide banned literature 

Holstein cow My Gold from Wisconsin scores US record in yearly milk production, new amount to beat 34,866 liters, almost 1,300 liters more than previous record holder Gigi 

PETA writes to Warhammer creators, claims fur wearing fantasy characters not acceptable according to moral codes in the year 40,000 

Senegalese chimps kill previous alpha male returning to group, one of nine known cases when adult male has been killed by own group 

Stone marten that put particle accelerator CERN out of action on display at Dutch museum together with other stuffed animals with similar fates 

British warship Lord Clive sunk by Spanish in 1763 believed to carry gold coins worth 1 billion GBP to be raised outside Colonia del Sacramento in Uruguay by 80 staff at cost of 4 million GBP 

23% of the most famous historic persons were politicians, followed by actors, soccer players and writers, study of Wikipedia's database shows 

Fossil of Saccorhytus coronarius found in China, oldest known predecessor to vertebrates was one millimeter in size and lived between grains of sand on sea bed 

Goebbels Secretary Brunhilde Pomsel dies at 106 years of age, one of the last living people who had close contact with Nazi leaders 

Elon Musk criticized for his rejection of Trump's travel ban has not been sufficiently sharp and that he would not join the choir depicting the newly elected President as a disaster 

Masaya Nakamura, founder of game company Namco which developed Pac-Man, dead at 91 years of age 

Seven students at Jamaica school said to be possessed by demons after graves disturbed by extension works 

Chinese participation in Asian Winter Games in jeopardy as Sapporo, Japan hotel where athletes are to live keeps forbidden literature – book The Real History of Japan claims Nanking massacre never happened, South Korea has also protested 

Black humor is associated with high intelligence and low propensity to aggression according to Austrian study published in the Cognitive Processing 

British actor John Hurt dead at 77 years of age, known for roles in Alien, Elephant Man and V for Vendetta 

Football club Real Madrid removes cross from emblem on shirts to be sold in Arab countries 

Rap group Insane Clown Posse to march on Washington in protest against fans being labeled as gang members by FBI 

US wins chef competition Bocuse d'Or for first time since its start 30 years ago, won with French crayfish and chicken dish 

Raven in Canadian Yellowknife rips parking ticket, unclear if motivated by hunger or disputing the fine 

Silicon Valley elite turn preppers, investing in remote real estate, air filtered bunkers, motorcycles, gold coins, eye surgery and fully gassed helicopters 

One million palm trees get planted in Bangladesh, intended to decrease number of deaths caused by lightning strikes 

Studio behind Star Trek fan film that raised USD 1 million in crowdfunding settles copyright battle with Paramount Pictures, movie will be significantly shorter and won't be monetized  

After twelve second places Kisenosato wins first sumo-hanbasho, defeated Yokozuna Hakuho of Mongolia in last round, estimated to have good chance to be first Japanese to be promoted to Yokozuna since 1998 

Iceman Ötzi ate dry-cured fatty bacon-like meat, research on his stomach and its contents shows 

South Korean star chef hosts cooking show combining World of Warcraft with cookery, dishes inspired by the fantasy game complemented with guests talking about their game experiences 

Multicultural exhibition on faith held in Gloucester Cathedral, commences with call to prayer by imam in front of 1,000 visitors 

Israel's national library acquires Valmadonna Trust Library, with 10,000 titles considered to be world's largest private collection of Hebrew books and manuscripts 

Newly-discovered moth named after Donald Trump due to yellow-white scales on head resembling president elect's characteristic hair, is named Neopalpa donaldtrumpi 

Catholic organization Opus Dei begins process to elect new prelate following bishop Javier Echevarria's demise in December 2016 

Japanese toilet manufacturers agree on common symbols for toilet control panels, standard introduced in April and manufacturers hope this will assist tourists to use toilets and promote exports 

Replica of Julian Assange's room in Ecuadorian embassy is displayed in Paris museum 

Man in Oklahoma ordered to pay USD 500 per month in maintenance for child that is not his, paternity testing was done one year late 

Dutch vegan in Gipf-Oberfrick refused Swiss nationality because she is considered too annoying, the case will now be decided at the cantonal level 

Boots whose soles gives imprint depicting swastikas revoked after lots of reviewers on Amazon wrote jokes related to Nazism 

Ugandan top bureaucrat buried in accordance with his last will with money to bribe God and receive His forgiveness, clan forces exhumation and finds USD 5,700 

Russian Embassy in Britain posts tweet with Pepe the Frog, is accused of hate speech 

Polish sociologist and writer Zygmunt Bauman dies at 91 years of age 

Chinese factory gives attention to year of the Rooster in Chinese astrology by launching giant inflatable Trump rooster, ten-meter version offered on Taobao for approximately USD 2,000 

Pope welcomes breastfeeding during ceremony in Sistine Chapel, refers to Virgin Mary breastfeeding Jesus 

Philipp Oehmke: Political correctness becoming embarassing even for the left — while students at Oberlin worried about cultural imperialism in the cafeteria Trump won the election 

Author and art critic John Berger dead at age 90, never understood that great art "has nothing to do with any notion of democracy" 

Reelected, city councilman of Brazilian town takes office in cuffs, currently faces extortion charges (Portuguese)

Rod Dreher: Progressive movement's incomprehension of Middle Ages caused by linear view of history, as during 19th century reaction against Enlightenment medieval ideals of virtue and spirituality can establish order in a decadent time 

Derek Parfit passes away at 74 years of age, contributed as philosopher to understanding of ethics, meta-ethics, rationality and personal identity 

RMS Titanic's hull weakened by fire in earlier incident, primary reason for wrecking of ocean liner, say experts 

Critics and writers appoint most important literary works of recent 20 years, The Road by Cormac McCarthy, Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace and The Known World by Edward P. Jones share win 

Evolutionist X: The easily romanticized and musical Roma do not fare easily - low literacy, widespread poverty, family marriage and outsiders who want to meddle in their lives, unfortunately characterize the former nomads 

Father Frost and Snow Maiden must pay flat tax of 35-50 USD for knocking on doors in Belarus 

18-year-old student in Oklahoma blackmails sex worker by pretending to be an FBI agent, requires free services and threatens with jail, is convicted of impersonating an officer 

'Singin' in the Rain' actress Debbie Reynolds dead at 84, a day after daughter Carrie Fisher's passing 

Carrie Fisher dead at 60 after cardiac arrest, most known for portrayal of Princess Leia in Star Wars 

Mexican parents' video invitation to daughter's 15-year birthday party goes viral, thousands show up, horse race in girl's honor results in guest being trampled to death 

Pop singer George Michael is dead at 53 

Youngest ever professional shogi player debuts in first professional match, defeats oldest and highest ranked player in 62 years, who also held record as youngest professional debutant 

Chinese man stops using hand grenade as nut cracking tool after reading warning leaflet from police 

Purposeful KTH student graduates through manipulation and suspected cheating on credits given in take-home exams, writes Associate Professor Daniel Pargman with colleagues in article called Lord of the Graduation Ring 

British branch of Temple of the Jedi Order denied recognition as religion, Star Wars inspired Jediism deemed lacking spiritual and non-secular elements, organization advocates compassion and serenity 

Kokomo, Indiana lifts 60-year-old ban on pinball, local police chief becomes first legal player since 1955 

Cuba offers to pay national debt to Czech Republic with rum, deputy finance minister interested but wants at least some cash, entire USD 270 million debt represents 130 years Czech consumption 

2 billion-year-old water found 2.4 kilometers below ground in Ontario mine, researches hope to learn about changes in atmosphere, say the water would taste disgusting to someone trying to drink it 

FPAQ is OPEC of maple syrup, cartel controls 72% of world supply and has driven up prices to 1,300 USD per barrel, accused of independent producers of mafia methods, in constant war against syrup pirates 

Church-within-the-Catholic-church Opus Dei loses last tie to founder generation, seeks new role 

12% of pilots suffer from depression, 4% have suicidal thoughts, according to anonymous survey with 1,848 responding of a sample of 3,500 

Fashwave synth music has become alt-right sound, driven by nostalgia for 80s and the notion that synth is whitest music ever